Book or no book, you’re still beautiful and blooming…
This was the thought running through my head as I relieved myself at 5:07 a.m. on the grand porcelain bowl.
Woke up, started coffee and relieved myself. Yes. Not much to write about. And probably not proper. And you don’t want to hear it. But rather than hold back, I need to fulfil the promise of this blog’s brand, “Real, Raw, Minimally Processed.”
The reason that thought popped into my head was because I was beginning that morning train of thought that throws me in a ditch of despair and self-loathing.
The “I didn’t do enough yesterday.” Or “I haven’t finished my goals for the week.” Or “The book is taking too long to finish…”
The ol’ Parent-Teacher-Thou-Shalt Shame Voice. That internalized judging meter. The ol’ “Nothing’s Good Enough No Matter How Good Enough It Is” voice.
Somehow, by some grace of something, my head switched tracks to “Book or no book, you’re still beautiful and blooming…”
I was thinking about meditating. How in meditation you let go of everything. You just BE. And BREATHE. And LISTEN. And OBSERVE. But you don’t jump on every little thought pony that comes galloping ‘cross the screen of your mind.
You just DETACH. And BREATHE.
Just being alive. Still beautiful and blooming. Right NOW.
Ram Dass, a great man who you should know about, wrote a book called BE HERE NOW. A classic from the early 70s (or maybe late 60s). A big square dark blue book. With really cool sayings and insights and pictures. A tome about his journey from Harvard Psychologist to New Age Meditation Man. It’s a beautiful book about his journey and relationship with his “Guru” – his Indian spiritual master.
That book had a profound effect on me when I first read it at 19.
It helped me see there was a whole ‘nother world apart from this one in front of us.
BE HERE NOW.
YOU’RE STILL BEAUTIFUL AND BLOOMING.
That moment in meditation where you click and realize—hopefully—everything’s all right. In this moment. This beautiful blooming moment.
No matter the money. No matter the accomplishments. No matter the material possessions.
So yeah…that’s what popped in my head as I was relieving myself on the grand porcelain bowl at 5:07 a.m. this morning.
Shut up, Bruce. You’re ok.
It’s all good…as they say.
Finding and staying in that “all good” place more than the “shit, I’m not doing enough, I’m not good enough, my life is not good enough, the world is not good enough” place is a life’s goal.
Good or not good.
It just is…
Jesus, I’m getting way too heavy for less than a full cup of coffee.
But I’ve been loving reconnecting with Ram Dass on Instagram and TikTok.
He passed on, but his videos and words still reverberate.
(Full disclosure, I had to stop this blog session and go and clean up some cat puke. Damn cat can’t stop puking up hairballs. And he’s in that “25% Tiger Awake mode” where he’s just crazy and can’t stop running around and being a mischievous little feline.)
Ram Dass. BE HERE NOW. Great book. Classic.
Even my daughter has it.
Life is beautiful and blooming (hopefully) even without attaining your accomplishments.
And then, on the flipside, we’re hardwired to achieve and dream and create and succeed.
How do you think we got from one out of 20 billion sperm to an egg to a person.
Alive on a grand porcelain bowl at 5:07 a.m.
Thinking about a book he’s creating…